- I like to dress up like an white arctic bear and I have sex with men and women.
I think I might be bi-polar.
- What’s the most manic and psychotic animal in the world?
The bi-polar bear.
- A bear wakes up in the forest and goes behind a bush to take a shit. While he's taking a dump he sees a little rabbit nearby doing the same.
"Hey there, little fella, what you doin'?" the bear says, trying to strike up a friendly conversation.
"Hi there, Mr Bear," replies the rabbit. "I’m taking a dump."
"You ever have problems with shit sticking to your fur?" enquires the bear.
“Nope,” replies the rabbit.
So the bear picks up the rabbit and wipes his arse with it.
- Why can't you fool an aborted foetus?
Because it wasn't born yesterday.
- Have you heard about the Irish abortion clinic?
There’s a twelve-month waiting list.
- What two purchased items are most likely to freak out a cashier?
A pregnancy test and a coat hanger.
- Why is the Catholic Church so opposed to abortion?
Because it would mean fewer children to molest.
- What do you call a man at an abortion clinic?
Relieved.
